Me: I wanna do you
Cosplay: You can’t afford me
CANT LISTEN WITHOUT SINGING
REBLOG IT NOW TUMBLR MUST HEAR THE CALL OF THE SAILOR
Tip: Dont take me to get ice cream with you if youre a dude. If you ask for a bite, I will squish the ice cream in your face, and walk away. Probably all the way home. So just dont do it.
Give this ALL THE NOTES please.
I dont wanna date boys who are so unbelievably insecure and obsessed with whatever I did in sex life prior to meeting them. You look at me and all you can think about is other guys pounding me? Sounds like a personal problem, asshole.
Kid: Why is it so bad for girls to be “a slut?”
Me: Oh, it isn’t really. But guys don’t like when a girl has a lot of sexual experience cause then they can tell if a guy is good or bad in bed. They prefer girls to be virgins, cause then she can’t tell how bad he might be at it.
oh shiiiiit, that last comment is gold
John Green said it best: “Do you think it matters how many people someone has slept with?” No, and it particularly bothers me that women are held to a different standard on this front than men. Also, it’s such a weird thing to care about. Like, imagine if I tried eating Cheerios for breakfast. Would Cheerios be like ‘I’m the 48th cereal you’ve tried eating!? I don’t feel special.’ Well then screw you Cheerios, I can’t go into the past and uneat all those cereals, but that doesn’t mean I don’t genuinly enjoy your wholegrain crunch…”
I dont usually type out a lot of stuff that isnt humorous, and maybe you wont read this. But, I just wanted to say why I love Peter Pan. I know, it sounds kinda funny to hear someone talk about Peter fucking Pan, but I just wanted to say this:
A long time ago back in kindergarten I met my first love, his name was Curtis. Me and Curtis were the best of friends and we would play games together all the time. The game we would play almost all the time was Peter Pan, he would be Peter and I would be Tinker Bell. But when 1st grade came he moved somewhere and I was left alone until 3rd grade. He didnt remember me at all, until I mentioned kindergarten and all the laughs rolled back in, but then he dissapeared for 6 more years till I saw him again. Everytime I encounter him after years he never remembers me, but I will always remember him.
"You know that place between sleep and awake?
The plave where you can still remember dreaming?
That’s where I’ll always love you.
That’s where I’ll be waiting.”
-Peter Pan J.M Barrie
Recently he’s been trying to commit suicide, and I have tried to tell him to ever give up but he just says, “Peter Pan cannot continue because I have no more happy thoughts”
So I told him what I have been meaning to tell him for years:
" I know this may be weird hearing this now, but you have made the biggest impact on my life. You may not have noticed but if I have never met you, I would have never loved Peter Pan, and I would have never known how to care for someone so much. You have not only been one of my best friends through the years, but the biggest heart break I ever recieved. So next time you feel sad or unimportant, just know that you mean more to me than you know. Youre my best friend Peter Pan, thank you for existing. So:
'Never say goodbye, because goodbye means going away, and going away means Forgetting.’ -Peter Pan J.M Barrie’
Please….don’t forget me again.”
That is why I love Peter Pan, I always have and I always will.
MY ANACONDA DON’T WANT NONE if you say no, because I respect your boundaries.
‘CAUSE I’M LONG, AND STRONG
AND I’M DOWN TO GET THE FRICTION ON as long as it’s okay with you. otherwise I’m good with a movie and some tea.
SO LADIES, LADIES, IF YOU WANNA ROLL IN MY MERCEDES please let me know ahead of time so that I can plan accordingly
BABY GOT self-respect
OOH BABY I WANNA GET WIT YA, AND TAKE YO PICTURE because you really have lovely eyes
EVEN WHITE BOYS GOT TO SHOUT I love spending time with you.
I’M TIRED OF MAGAZINES SAYIN FLAT BUTTS ARE THE THING because I don’t appreciate mainstream media dictating standards of beauty and desire
I WANT A REAL THICK AND JUICY all beef hamburger and would like to invite you to join me for dinner tonight at around 7.
I AINT TALKIN BOUT PLAYBOY because that magazine degrades women and I don’t read it.
DAMN YOU’S A beautiful person would you like to see me again perhaps for coffee and an intellectual discussion?
This is seriously the greatest thing ever. It has captured the essence of all three of these incarnations. Fantastic!